I provide Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS Therapy), a psychotherapy approach developed by Dr. Richard C. Schwartz in the 1980s. It is based on the idea that the mind comprises multiple sub-personalities or “parts,” each with unique perspectives, memories, and roles. The internal family systems model aims to help individuals achieve healing by fostering harmony and balance among these internal parts. This approach can be used alone or, more commonly, combined with other approaches in an interactive practice like mine. It fits well with many humanistic approaches and psychodynamic therapy.
If you already know about Internal Family Systems Therapy and want to talk about how it might work for you, please contact me or schedule a consultation anytime.
Internal Family Systems Model
This section provides an overview of the internal family systems model, including its components and uses.
Internal Family Systems Components
Here are some key concepts and components of IFS Therapy:
- Parts of the Internal System:
- Managers: These parts try to maintain control over the internal and external environments to protect the person from feeling hurt or vulnerable.
- Exiles: These are often the parts that carry the pain, trauma, and memories of past experiences. Managers typically suppress or exile them.
- Firefighters: These parts emerge when exiles break out and their painful feelings surface. Firefighters attempt to numb or distract from this pain, often through impulsive or harmful behaviors.
- Self:
- In the internal family systems model, the self is considered the core of the person, characterized by qualities such as compassion, curiosity, calmness, confidence, creativity, courage, clarity, and connectedness. In IFS therapy, it is believed that everyone has a Self capable of leading the internal system toward healing.
- Unburdening:
- This IFS Therapy process involves helping the exiled parts release the burdens of pain and trauma, often leading to relief and integration within the individual.
- Integration:
- IFS therapy aims to help all parts of the self work together harmoniously, led by the Self. This integration leads to a more balanced and healthy internal system.
- Therapeutic Relationship:
- In the internal family systems model, the therapist serves as a guide to help the client connect with and navigate their internal parts. The therapist models qualities of the Self and helps the client cultivate these within themselves.
Internal Family Systems Uses
IFS therapy is effective in treating a variety of psychological issues individuals face, including clinical depression, anxiety, PTSD, and more. As detailed above, the internal family systems model emphasizes the importance of understanding and healing the inner family of parts rather than focusing solely on external symptoms.
Internal Family Systems Therapy Process
Internal Family Systems Therapy employs various techniques to help individuals understand, relate to, and heal their internal parts. Here are some fundamental techniques used in IFS Therapy:
- Mapping the System:
- You and I create a visual or conceptual map of your internal parts. This helps identify the different parts, their roles, relationships, and the dynamics between them.
- Getting to Know the Parts:
- I then guide you in identifying and connecting with your parts. This involves noticing thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations representing different parts. You might do some of this as early homework in IFS therapy.
- I will ask you to listen to their parts without judgment, fostering an open and curious attitude.
- Unblending:
- This internal family systems therapy technique involves helping you differentiate or “unblend” from your parts. When a part is very active, it can blend with your identity, making it difficult to see it as separate.
- Unblending helps you recognize that you are not the part but rather have a part experiencing certain thoughts and feelings.
- Accessing the Self:
- In the next step in internal family systems therapy, I encourage you to access your Self, the core aspect of your calm, compassionate, and curious identity.
- Techniques such as mindfulness, visualization, and relaxation exercises can help you connect with your Self.
- Dialoguing with Parts:
- Next, I facilitate conversations with your parts. This dialogue helps parts express their concerns, desires, and roles.
- I help you listen to the parts with empathy and curiosity, fostering understanding and connection.
- Witnessing and Validating:
- Next, you are guided to witness the experiences and burdens of your parts without trying to fix or change them immediately.
- This process validates the parts’ feelings and experiences, which can be healing.
- Unburdening:
- This IFS therapy technique involves helping parts release the burdens they carry, often related to past trauma or negative beliefs.
- I’ll help you assist the part to let go of these burdens, which can lead to a sense of relief and freedom.
- Integration and Harmonization:
- The goal is to create harmony and balance among the parts, led by the Self. This involves fostering cooperation and collaboration among parts.
- This core aspect of the internal family systems model involves doing homework where you integrate the changes and healing that occur during therapy into your daily life.
Other IFS Therapy Methods
In addition to the process above, some clients benefit from having inner family meetings. Similar to family therapy, but within the internal system, these meetings involve bringing multiple parts together for a dialogue. This can help resolve conflicts, improve communication, and create a sense of unity among the parts.
Other people enjoy using creative expression techniques where you draw, journal, or role-play to explore and express their parts. These techniques can help us access and understand parts that might be difficult to reach through verbal communication alone.
Each internal family therapy technique is designed to help clients build a compassionate relationship with their internal parts, leading to healing and greater internal harmony. My role in the internal family systems model is to facilitate this process, ensuring you feel safe and supported throughout your journey.
IFS Therapy Example
Sarah is a 35-year-old woman experiencing anxiety and low self-esteem, especially in social situations. She has tried some other types of therapy but with only minimal success.
Session Outline:
1. Introduction and Establishing Safety
I’ve already talked to Sarah on the phone after she called with questions about how internal family systems therapy might work for her. She is quite creative and insightful, and I thought it might be a good fit. I start by saying, “Welcome, Sarah. Today, we’ll explore some parts of yourself that might be contributing to your anxiety and low self-esteem. Remember, you control this process, and we’ll go at your pace.”
2. Mapping the System
- Me: “Let’s start by identifying the different parts of you that come up when you feel anxious or have low self-esteem. Can you think of a time when you recently felt this way?”
- Sarah: “Yes, last week at a work meeting, I felt really anxious and unsure of myself.”
- Me: “Great. Can you describe the different feelings, thoughts, or sensations you noticed during that time?”
Sarah identifies:
- A critical voice telling her she’s not good enough (a Manager part).
- A sense of overwhelming fear and inadequacy (an Exile part).
- A strong urge to leave the room or distract herself (a Firefighter part).
3. Getting to Know the Parts
- Me: “Let’s start with the critical voice. Can you focus on it for a moment and see if it has anything it wants to tell you?”
- Sarah: “It says I need to be perfect, or people will think I’m a failure.”
4. Unblending
- Me: “That’s an important part of you. Let’s see if you can step back a little and observe this critical voice without being overwhelmed. Can you imagine it sitting beside you rather than inside you?”
- Sarah: “I think so. It feels a bit separate now.”
5. Accessing the Self
- Me: “Now that you have some space, can you find a sense of calmness or curiosity inside yourself? This is your Self, which can help lead the way.”
- Sarah: “I feel a bit more relaxed and curious about why this part is so critical.”
6. Dialoguing with Parts
- Me: “From this place of curiosity, let’s ask the critical part: Why does it feel the need to be so hard on you? What is it trying to protect you from?”
- Sarah: “It says it’s trying to protect me from being judged or failing. It thinks if I’m perfect, no one can hurt me.”
7. Witnessing and Validating
- Me: “Thank you for sharing that. Let’s acknowledge that this part has been working hard to protect you. Can you thank it for its efforts?”
- Sarah: “Thank you for trying to keep me safe.”
8. Unburdening
- Me: “Would this part be willing to let go of some of its burdens, knowing that you’re now aware of its concerns and can take over from here?”
- Sarah: “It’s willing to try. It feels lighter already.”
9. Integration and Harmonization
- Me: “Let’s invite the other parts—the fearful part and the part that wants to escape—to join this conversation. Can you listen to them and see their feelings about what’s happening?”
- Sarah: “The fearful part feels relieved that it doesn’t have to carry the weight alone. The part that wants to escape feels like it can relax a bit.”
10. Closing the Session
- Me: “You did great work today, Sarah. How do you feel about what we discovered?”
- Sarah: “I feel more in control and compassionate toward myself. I understand these parts better now.”
Follow-Up:
- Me: “For our next session, let’s continue exploring these parts and see if other parts need attention. Meanwhile, practice being curious and compassionate towards your parts.”
This example illustrates how an internal family systems therapy session might unfold. My client is helped to understand and heal their internal system through a compassionate and structured approach.
Summary and My IFS Work
Internal family systems therapy is an excellent approach for those who want to explore their inner psychology creatively and powerfully. The internal family systems model provides an excellent adjunctive treatment to cognitive-behavioral and humanistic therapy techniques such as gestalt therapy and narrative treatment. Note that as much as they sound alike, IFS is different from family systems therapy, which involves treating the whole family.
If this treatment approach resonates, or you just want more information about how it might work for you, please contact me or schedule a consultation anytime.
