I provide therapy for holiday anxiety caused by many factors related to this season. Anxiety and the holidays often go hand-in-hand, as travel pressures, family get-togethers, and work issues often make this time of year stressful. For some, holiday depression and anxiety are severe and require a deep dive into challenges. For others, just a brief and solution-focused course of therapy tends to provide great benefits. This post explores holiday stress and anxiety, my services, some self-help tips, and a case example. If you have more specific questions or want to discuss how therapy might benefit you or a loved one experiencing holiday stress, don’t hesitate to get in touch with me or schedule a consultation anytime.
Holiday Anxiety Therapy 
Therapy can be a powerful tool for addressing holiday anxiety, providing strategies to navigate stressors and build resilience. Individual therapy, couples therapy, and family treatment may all be helpful. Here’s an overview of what you can do about anxiety and the holidays.
Therapeutic Approaches for Holiday Anxiety
The following are the most common types of therapy I use for holiday depression and anxiety. These approaches can be mixed, and there are others we can add.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
- Challenge negative thoughts: Therapy can help identify unhelpful beliefs like “Everything has to be perfect” or “People will judge me negatively” and replace them with healthier perspectives.
- Reframe expectations: Focus on meaningful moments rather than perfection and not predict negative responses related to anxiety and the holidays.
- Mindfulness-Based Therapy
- Learn to stay present during this time instead of worrying about the past or future.
- Practice relaxation techniques to reduce anxiety in social or family settings.
- Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
- Explore ways to accept stress as part of the experience without letting it dominate your emotions.
- Use your values to guide decisions, like prioritizing connections over material aspects.
- Interpersonal Therapy (IPT)
- If family dynamics are a major source of stress, IPT can help improve communication and set boundaries.
- Role-playing can prepare you for difficult conversations related to anxiety and the holidays.
- Trauma-Informed Therapy
- If this time brings up painful memories or unresolved trauma, I can help you work through these triggers and develop coping strategies.
Other approaches to anxiety and the holidays include logotherapy when issues are existential and deep and psychodynamic therapy when internal conflicts are causing stress.
Common Topics to Explore in Holiday Anxiety Therapy
People come in hoping to explore, resolve, or gain insight into many topics related to the holidays and anxiety. Here are a few examples.
- Boundary setting with family and friends.
- Navigating grief or loss during the holidays.
- Managing social anxiety at gatherings.
- Dealing with financial stress related to gift-giving and events.
- Handling feelings of loneliness or isolation.
Homework to Help with Anxiety and the Holidays
Given that there is often a bit of time pressure when the reason for therapy is anxiety and the holidays, I often give homework for my client to do outside of the session. Here are some examples.
- Develop a Coping Plan: Identify triggers and work with your therapist to create strategies for managing them.
- Role-Play Scenarios: Practice responses to difficult family dynamics or social situations.
- Journaling Exercises: Reflect on what’s causing anxiety and what you can control.
- Visualization: Use guided imagery to prepare for challenges mentally.
- Behavioral Activation: Doing things that bring joy, even if you don’t always feel like it.
Finding the Right Therapist
I would welcome seeing you to help you manage anxiety and the holidays, but if you would prefer to see someone near you, look for therapists experienced in treating anxiety or specializing in holiday stress. You might also consider group therapy sessions focused on managing seasonal stressors.
Anxiety and the Holidays Toolkit
Holiday anxiety is common and can stem from a variety of sources, including social obligations, financial pressures, family dynamics, or simply the disruption of daily routines. Here are some strategies to help manage holiday stress and anxiety:
1. Plan Ahead for Holiday Anxiety
- Set a schedule for shopping, decorating, and attending events to avoid last-minute stress. It may be helpful for families to devise this schedule together because sometimes, the urgency from those who have fallen behind can create stress for everyone.
- Budget for gifts and travel to prevent financial strain.
- Know your limits and don’t overcommit to activities, including parties. At the same time, realize that attending some social events can reduce holiday stress by connecting—and maybe commiserating—with others.
2. Practice Self-Care to Reduce Holiday Anxiety
- Maintain regular sleep, exercise, and healthy eating habits despite the festivities.
- Take short breaks to breathe or engage in mindfulness practices, even for just 5 minutes.
- Schedule time for activities that relax and recharge you, like reading, journaling, or going for a walk. The holidays put a lot of pressure on people to be social, which can be good. But it would be best if you still had time for yourself.
3. Manage Expectations
- Accept that not everything has to be perfect. Focus on what matters most and realize that the task list may never be complete.
- Set boundaries with family or friends if certain dynamics feel overwhelming. It’s okay to say no. Permit them to say no to you, too.
- Realize that some degree of stress and anxiety is expected and set goals to have lower but not zero stress this year.
4. Simplify When Possible
- Consider alternatives, like drawing names for gifts instead of buying for everyone.
- Host potluck meals to share the workload if you’re entertaining.
- Limit your time at events that feel draining. You may even want to set this up ahead of time. Tell the host that you’re likely to have to leave early, and then if you are enjoying yourself, you can always stay.
5. Prioritize Mental Health
- Practice grounding techniques, like deep breathing or focusing on your surroundings if you feel overwhelmed by holiday anxiety.
- Reflect on what this season means to you, and let that guide your decisions.
- Reach out for support if needed—talk to trusted friends, family, or a mental health professional.
Holiday Depression and Anxiety Case Example
Here’s a fictitious case example illustrating how therapy can address holiday depression and anxiety. This happens to be an individual, but therapy for holiday depression and anxiety can also be delivered to couples and families.
Holiday Depression and Anxiety: Taylor, 28-year-old Teacher
Presenting Issues:
Taylor reports increased anxiety and sadness during this season. Stressors include financial pressures, strained family relationships, and loneliness after moving to a new city for work. Taylor has been avoiding family events and experiencing difficulty sleeping, overeating, and low energy.
Holiday Depression and Anxiety Therapeutic Goals:
- Reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety.
- Develop healthy coping mechanisms for family interactions and financial stress.
- Build social connections and identify ways to find joy in the season.
Holiday Depression and Anxiety Therapy Process
Session 1: Initial Assessment and Goal Setting
- Key Stressors Identified:
- Anxiety around family gatherings due to past conflicts.
- Financial worries about gift-giving and travel costs.
- Loneliness and a lack of a local support system.
- Taylor rates their depression as a 7/10 and anxiety as an 8/10.
- I normalize Taylor’s feelings and collaborate on a plan to address these stressors.
Session 2: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Depression and Anxiety (CBT)
- Challenging Cognitive Distortions:
- Taylor believes, “If I don’t go home for the holidays, my family will think I don’t care,” and “I have to buy expensive gifts to show I value people.”
- I help Taylor reframe these thoughts, focusing on the following: “Caring is shown through connection, not just presence or presents.”
- Action Plan: Taylor sets boundaries around which family events to attend and creates a budget for gift-giving.
Session 3: Mindfulness and Stress Reduction
- Mindfulness Techniques: I introduce grounding exercises, such as deep breathing and a 5-senses check-in, to manage anxiety during family events.
- Relaxation Practice: Taylor learns progressive muscle relaxation when feeling overwhelmed with holiday stress.
Session 4: Grief and Loneliness
- Taylor opens up about missing old traditions with friends and feeling disconnected in their new city.
- Coping with Loss: I help Taylor create new traditions, like hosting a brunch with coworkers or joining a local volunteering group.
- Building Connections: Taylor commits to attending a community holiday event to meet new people.
Session 5: Family Dynamics and Assertive Communication
- Boundary Setting: I use role-playing to help Taylor practice setting limits with a critical family member.
- Example phrase: “I’d prefer not to talk about that topic. Let’s focus on enjoying the meal.”
- Emotion Regulation: Taylor identifies calming strategies before and after family interactions, such as journaling or a short walk.
Session 6: Holiday Stress Review and Maintenance
- Taylor and I reviewed the progress made:
- Taylor reports reduced anxiety (4/10) and feels more in control of plans.
- New traditions and connections have lessened feelings of loneliness.
- A relapse prevention plan is developed, emphasizing self-care and continued social outreach.
Outcomes:
Taylor successfully navigates the season with fewer symptoms of depression and anxiety, feels empowered to set boundaries with family, and finds joy in new traditions and connections. Therapy concludes in January, and Taylor plans to return for follow-ups as needed.
Holiday Anxiety in Teenagers Case Example
Background
Emma is a 15-year-old high school student referred to therapy by her school counselor. She reports feeling overwhelmed and anxious every year as winter approaches. Emma describes the holidays as “too much” due to her parents’ divorce, unrealistic expectations to maintain high grades during finals, and pressure to socialize at family gatherings. She also mentions the financial strain on her family, which adds guilt around asking for gifts and her holiday depression and anxiety in general.
Presenting Problem: Holiday Depression and Anxiety
- Anxiety Triggers: Crowded gatherings, loud environments, family conflict, and feeling torn between spending time with both parents create significant stress.
- Symptoms: Holiday stress causes trouble sleeping, irritability, difficulty concentrating on schoolwork, and physical symptoms like headaches and stomachaches.
- Coping Mechanisms: Avoiding family discussions, procrastinating on school assignments, and withdrawing from friends.
Therapeutic Goals: Reduce Holiday Anxiety
- Our work together is designed to help Emma identify specific triggers for her holiday anxiety.
- I will help Emma learn practical skills to manage overwhelming feelings during the season.
- We will discuss healthier ways to communicate and set boundaries with family members.
Therapeutic Approach
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT):
- Cognitive Restructuring: We will explore Emma’s thought patterns related to anxiety and the holidays, like “I have to make everyone happy,” and replace them with more balanced thoughts, e.g., “It’s okay to prioritize my needs.”
- Behavioral Activation: We will develop a plan to include activities Emma enjoys during this time, like baking or watching movies with friends, to create positive associations.
- Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques:
- I will teach Emma mindfulness-based stress reduction exercises, such as deep breathing or progressive muscle relaxation, to use when she feels holiday depression and anxiety.
- We will use guided imagery, such as imagining a “calm moment,” to help her cope with stressful gatherings.
- Family Systems Therapy:
- Parent Sessions: We will have family therapy sessions to reduce conflict during shared planning and encourage understanding Emma’s needs.
- Boundary Setting: I will help Emma set gentle but firm boundaries, such as deciding how much time to spend with each parent.
- Social Skills Training:
- Emma will practice assertive communication for situations like declining invitations or managing difficult conversations at family gatherings.
- Gratitude Exercises:
- I introduce a gratitude journal to help Emma focus on the positive aspects of the season and shift her attention away from stress.
Therapy for Holiday Anxiety Outcome
Over several sessions, Emma learns to manage her holiday anxiety by reframing her expectations and utilizing coping strategies. Her physical symptoms related to anxiety and the holidays decrease, and she feels more confident navigating family dynamics. Emma also discovers a new tradition of volunteering during the season, which gives her a sense of fulfillment and perspective.
Summary and My Work
I provide therapy for holiday stress and anxiety, starting at any point of the year. For some people, holiday stress starts well before the winter holidays; for others, it persists well into the new year. I usually see people individually for holiday anxiety therapy. Still, I do sometimes see couples for therapy or families when they are facing similar stress, or holiday stress affects relationships. I also offer adjunctive parent coaching when these issues intersect with parenting stress, and specific single parent therapy when people are raising children independently. Often, therapy for holiday depression and anxiety is a part of ongoing individual therapy as well since it can upset and intensify existing challenges. It can also be a subset of other treatments, such as therapy for social anxiety.
I hope this post was helpful and informative. If you have more specific questions or want to talk more about how therapy for holiday anxiety might benefit you or a loved one, please feel free to get in touch with me or schedule a consultation anytime.
