Couples Therapy

I provide couples therapy to any people in a committed relationship. This treatment can bring people closer, increase understanding, and provide insights no matter how long people have been together. A couples therapist allows clients to do needed work its hard to do on their own. Closely related “Marriage Counseling” is dedicated to partners who have had a formal commitment.

Powerful | Effective | Relationship Changing

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Couples Therapy Overview

During couples therapy sessions, I provide a safe and supportive environment for couples to explore their feelings, thoughts, and concerns. I work to help clients identify negative patterns of behavior and communication and provide tools and techniques to improve their relationship.

Couples Therapy Formats

This therapy can be conducted in various formats, including individual sessions with a therapist, joint sessions with both partners or a combination of the two. The duration of treatment varies depending on the pair’s specific needs and the nature of their issues. I also offer premarital counseling as a sub-specialty.

Couples Therapy Results

Overall, couples therapy can be a valuable resource for those seeking to improve their relationship, whether facing specific challenges or simply looking to enhance their connection and communication. It can provide a framework for people to work through difficulties and create a healthier, more satisfying partnership.

Reasons for Couples Therapy

This form of treatment is a valuable resource for those facing a wide range of challenges. It can be delivered after marriage or as pre-marital counseling to address potential issues and build a strong foundation for their marriage. This treatment can also be helpful for those in a long-term relationship, whether or not it will likely lead to marriage. The issues addressed in couples therapy include but are not limited to:

Couples Therapy for Communication Problems

Many people struggle with effective communication, leading to misunderstandings, conflicts, and emotional distance. Treatment can teach better communication skills and techniques. This is a common starting point since communication provides the basis for many other changes.

Couples Therapy for Conflict Resolution

Conflicts are a natural part of any relationship, but unresolved conflicts can lead to resentment and long-term damage. I can help people learn how to address and resolve conflicts healthily and productively. One example is money-related disputes, which are common in relationships and can lead to significant stress. Treatment can help you develop strategies for managing finances and resolving money-related conflicts.

Couples Therapy After Infidelity

Trust is often broken when one or both partners have been unfaithful, and the relationship can be severely damaged. Therapy can help couples work through the aftermath of infidelity, rebuild trust, and decide whether to continue the relationship.

Intimacy Issues

Many pairs experience intimacy-related challenges, including differences in sexual desire, dysfunction, or issues related to past trauma. Treatment can assist in addressing these issues and finding ways to improve their physical and emotional connection.

Couples Therapy and Parenting Issues

Raising children can stress a relationship as parent navigate differences in parenting styles, values, and priorities. Couples therapy can guide couples on how to co-parent effectively and maintain a healthy relationship while raising a family.

Steps in Couples Therapy

Treatment follows the following general steps

Couples Therapy and Assessment and Goal Setting

The first session often involves me getting to know the pair, their history, and the issues they are facing. I help them identify their goals for treatment. These goals could include improving communication, resolving conflicts, or rebuilding trust. Establishing a trusting and open relationship among us is essential during this phase. This helps them feel comfortable discussing their concerns and emotions.

The Start of Couples Therapy

Many pairs struggle with effective communication. For treatment to have the maximum chance for success, I teach them how to communicate better by listening actively, expressing themselves clearly, and avoiding destructive communication patterns like criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. This also involves strategies for resolving conflicts more healthily, including identifying underlying issues, compromising, and finding win-win solutions.

Exploration of Underlying Issues

As the therapy progresses, we often uncover and explore the deeper issues contributing to their conflicts, such as past traumas, family dynamics, or individual emotional struggles. This is where we might try individual sessions alongside joint sessions, which can help address personal issues affecting the relationship.

Homework From the Couples Therapist

Clients are often given homework assignments to practice the skills and strategies they learn in therapy daily. This can be essential for making lasting changes. The success of couples therapy may depend on how motivated both people are to work on things outside of sessions.

Progress Evaluation and Couples Therapy Termination

I periodically evaluate progress and whether the pair are achieving their goals. When they feel they have completed their goals and made substantial progress, we may terminate therapy. Alternatively, some continue with periodic “maintenance” sessions to ensure continued growth and stability.

Outcomes

The outcomes of treatment can vary depending on several factors, including the specific issues you are facing and the level of commitment from both partners. Here are some potential outcomes:

Improved Communication through Couples Therapy

Treatmemt often focuses on enhancing communication skills, which can help partners better understand each other’s needs and concerns. Improved communication can lead to healthier and more productive interactions, which in turn can lead to better tools and strategies for resolving conflicts more effectively. Clients can learn how to address disagreements constructively and find mutually satisfying solutions. They can also learn new problem-solving skills, which are essential for addressing challenges that may arise in the future.

Increased Intimacy and Meaning through Couples Therapy

Many people seek therapy to reconnect with each other emotionally and physically. Couples therapy can help reignite intimacy and strengthen the emotional bond between partners. For some, treatment can reaffirm their commitment to each other. They may realize the value of their relationship and work to nurture it.

Better Understanding of Relationship Dynamics

People often gain insight into the patterns and dynamics in their relationship. This awareness can help them break negative cycles and make positive changes. Those facing emotional distress, such as depression or anxiety, related to their relationship may experience relief and improvement in their mental health through treatment.

Couples Therapy and Coping with Life Transitions

People may seek treatment during significant life transitions, such as becoming parents, retiring, or dealing with illness. It can help them adapt to these changes and maintain a strong partnership. Sometimes, treatment can be helpful after the transition. It allows them to process what went well, what could have gone better, and how they can best support each other going forward.

It’s important to note that treatment effectiveness can vary, and success is not guaranteed. It largely depends on both partners’ willingness to engage in the process and make necessary changes. Sometimes, therapy is seen as a last resort, but other times, the pair is generally doing well and wants to iron out some ongoing issues.

Couples Therapy FAQ

What individual couples techniques will you use?

My psychology practice is integrative and thus I can draw from a variety of techniques and approaches. When we meet and I learn more about what the two of you are looking for, I will go over the possible approaches and combinations of methods we can choose from. One possibility is interpersonal therapy while another is narrative couples therapy.

How long will couples therapy take?

After you make your goals, we’ll discuss your treatment plan, which will describe how long it may take to see meaningful and important improvements in your relationship. The depth of your challenges and how long they have affected your relationship will play a part.

How often will we meet?

I like to start with weekly sessions for at least 3-4 weeks so I can fully understand the history of your relationship and the challenges you are facing. After that, we can discuss the frequency of sessions, and we can always change it as you reach goals or set new ones.

Will we meet virtually or in-person?

I meet with many clients virtually, and I’ve found no difference in the effectiveness of meeting online. For many, it’s easier to meet virtually because they will not be in the same place simultaneously. When we are scheduled. I provide more information about online treatment in my blog post: Virtual Therapy Effectiveness.

How will we know that couples therapy is working?

It should not be a mystery whether therapy is working. We will set measurable, important, and clear goals, and as we progress, we will ensure that relationship therapy is working to help the two of you reach them.

Final thoughts

What Does a Couples Therapist Do?

A couples therapist helps couples resolve conflicts and improve their relationships. Their primary goals include:

1. Improving Communication: A couples therapist helps couples develop effective communication skills, ensuring both partners can constructively express their feelings and needs.

2. Conflict Resolution: A couples therapist assists couples in resolving disputes by identifying underlying issues and teaching problem-solving techniques.

3. Enhancing Intimacy: A couples therapist works to strengthen emotional and physical intimacy, addressing any barriers to closeness.

4. Building Trust: A couples therapist helps the pair rebuild trust, especially after incidents like infidelity or betrayal.

5. Identifying Patterns: A couples therapist identifies negative relationship patterns and works to replace them with healthier behaviors. They help people set realistic goals for their relationship and develop a plan to achieve them.

6. Providing Support: Therapists offer a supportive environment where both partners feel heard and understood.

7. Offering Tools and Techniques: A couples therapist provides practical tools and techniques that can improve relationships outside of therapy sessions.

8. Facilitating Difficult Conversations: A couples therapist creates a safe space for couples to discuss sensitive topics that they may find challenging to address.

Couples Therapist Methods

A couples therapist uses various therapeutic approaches, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Narrative Therapy, Integrative Behavioral Couples Therapy, and others. In an integrative practice like mine, I can tailor the interventions to the specific needs of each couple.