Choosing to go to therapy is a crucial step toward enhancing emotional well-being, strengthening relationships, and promoting personal growth. A therapy appointment provides a safe and confidential space where individuals, couples, and families can explore their challenges, gain insight, and develop effective coping strategies. Whether you are grappling with mental health symptoms, navigating life transitions, or simply looking to deepen self-understanding, going to therapy can be incredibly valuable. Understanding when and how to engage in treatment — and how to support loved ones in doing so — can empower people to make informed decisions about their mental health care. This post covers questions such as, “Why do people go to therapy?”, “Should I go to therapy?”, and more.
Going to therapy—especially for the first time—can feel like stepping into the unknown. You might wonder: What will I say? Will they judge me? Will it even help? These are normal questions. The truth is: at a therapy appointment, it is not about being perfect or saying the right thing—it’s about being real, even if that means saying “I don’t know where to start.”
What is a Therapy Appointment Like, and What is it Like to Go to Therapy
Here’s a breakdown of what a typical therapy appointment is like and what it feels like to go to therapy. 
What Is a Therapy Appointment Like?
Therapy Appointment Length & Format
- Most sessions are 45–60 minutes.
- They can be in person, via video, or by phone.
- It’s just you and the therapist in a private, confidential setting.
The First Session
The first session is often more of an introduction and assessment:
- The therapist may ask about:
- Why do you seek treatment
- Your current symptoms or concerns
- Mental health history
- Daily life (work, relationships, health)
- You’ll talk about goals: What do you want to change or feel better about?
- The therapist will explain confidentiality, their approach, and what the sessions will entail.
You can ask questions too, like:
- “How many people have you worked with who have anxiety/ADHD/trauma/etc?”
- “What kind of treatment approach do you use?”
- “How will we know if this is working?”
- “How long until I see measurable improvement?”
It’s okay to feel nervous or awkward at your therapy appointment—your therapist expects that.
Typical Sessions After That
After the first therapy appointment, sessions might include:
- Talking about what’s been going on that week (emotionally or situationally)
- Exploring your thoughts, patterns, or triggers
- Working on coping strategies or new perspectives
- Reflecting on past experiences that affect your current struggles
- Practicing skills (like grounding, communication, or boundary-setting)
The therapist won’t just sit silently or psychoanalyze you. Sound treatment is a collaborative process—you work together. This includes answering questions such as, “How often should you go to therapy?” “Can we work on other stuff?” and others.
What Does It Feel Like to Be in Therapy
At first, it might feel:
- Awkward (“What do I say?”)
- Uncertain (“Am I doing this right?”)
- Emotionally raw (you might cry, or feel relief)
- New and strange—like learning a new language
But over time, when you go to therapy, it starts to feel more like:
- A safe space where you can say anything
- Empowering—you start to understand yourself better
- Relieving—you’re no longer holding everything in alone
- Grounding—you have someone helping you make sense of things
What You Don’t Have to Be in a Therapy Appointment:
- “Fixed” or put-together
- Polite or perfect
- Always talkative or expressive
- Sure of what you want
Common Myths About Going to Therapy
| Myth | Reality |
| “Therapy is only for people with serious problems.” | It is for anyone who wants support, clarity, or change. |
| “I won’t know what to say.” | You don’t have to—your therapist will help guide you. |
| “It’ll be uncomfortable forever.” | It might be at first, but therapy gets easier and more meaningful over time. |
| “Therapists just give advice.” | They help you explore, understand, and grow—not just tell you what to do. |
Why Do People Go to Therapy?
- You feel less alone
- You discover the roots of what you’ve been struggling with
- Untangling emotional knots becomes possible.
- You gain tools to manage life better
- You build self-understanding and self-compassion
Final Words
Why do people go to therapy? It doesn’t mean something’s “wrong” with you. Instead, it means you’re brave enough to take care of your mental and emotional well-being. It may feel hard at first, but over time, it often becomes a place of comfort, clarity, and deep personal growth. The reasons to go to therapy are varied but center on self-improvement and the desire to thrive.
Glossary of Therapist Terms
Here’s a glossary of common therapist terms—designed to help you feel more confident and less confused in sessions. Whether you’re new to the process or want a refresher, this list breaks down psychological terms in plain, human language.
When the therapist listens carefully, repeats back what you’re saying (in their own words), and checks to make sure they understand you correctly. It helps you feel heard and helps them get it right.
- Affect
This means your emotional expression—how you look or sound when talking (e.g., flat, sad, cheerful). A therapist might say, “Your affect seems low today.”
- Coping Skills
Tools or strategies you use to handle stress, anxiety, sadness, etc. Examples: breathing techniques, journaling, taking breaks, reframing thoughts.
A standard method focuses on the idea that your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are interconnected, so changing your thinking can help alter how you feel and act.
- Insight
Understanding something new about yourself—like realizing why you react a certain way, or what triggers your emotions. This is one of the main reasons to go to therapy – to build insight over time.
Simple actions that help calm your body and mind, especially during anxiety, panic, or dissociation. Example: naming five things you can see in the room.
- Validation
When the therapist acknowledges that your feelings are real and make sense, even if they’re difficult. Validation is key to feeling emotionally safe, and it is another key reason to go to therapy.
- Projection
A defense mechanism where you attribute your feelings or thoughts to someone else. Example: thinking someone’s mad at you, when you’re mad at them.
- Transference
When you unconsciously redirect feelings from someone in your past (like a parent) onto your therapist. It’s normal and can be helpful to explore.
- Countertransference
When a therapist reacts emotionally to a client, it is often based on their own past or feelings. Good clinicians stay aware of this and use supervision to manage it.
An approach that recognizes how past trauma affects current behavior and emotions, and ensures treatment is safe, respectful, and empowering.
- Reframing
Looking at a situation in a different, more helpful way. For example: “I failed” → “I learned something important.”
- Self-Regulation
Your ability to manage emotions, behaviors, and impulses, especially under stress. Treatment often helps improve this skill.
- Boundaries
The limits you set to protect your well-being, emotional, physical, or social. Therapists may help you recognize and strengthen healthy boundaries.
- Holding Space
When a therapist gives you room to feel what you feel without rushing, fixing, or judging. It’s quiet, accepting support.
- Psychoeducation
When a therapist teaches you about mental health concepts, diagnoses, or brain function, you will gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your experiences.
Refers to the body’s role in emotions or trauma. Somatic treatment focuses on how feelings show up in the body (e.g., tension, pain, restlessness).
Paying attention to the present moment without judgment. Often used to help with anxiety, stress, and emotional regulation.
- DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)
A method that combines acceptance and change strategies. It teaches skills like mindfulness, emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness.
- EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)
Used mainly for trauma and PTSD. It utilizes bilateral stimulation (similar to eye movements) to help the brain process distressing memories.
Bonus Therapist Terms
| Term | What It Means |
| Trigger | Something that sets off an emotional reaction (especially from trauma or stress). |
| Dysregulation | Feeling overwhelmed and unable to control emotions. |
| Attachment Style | The way you relate to others, shaped by early relationships (secure, anxious, avoidant, etc.). |
| Inner Child | The part of you that holds childhood emotions or unmet needs. |
| Processing | Working through emotions, thoughts, or memories with the therapist—making sense of them over time. |
Final Note About Therapist Terms
It’s okay to ask your provider what one of the therapist terms they use means—they’ll respect your curiosity. Therapy is a learning space, and part of the process is building a shared language that helps you grow.
Reasons to go to Therapy
Individual Psychotherapy
Mental Health & Emotional Challenges
- Depression, sadness, or emotional numbness
- Anxiety, panic attacks, or chronic worry
- Trauma or PTSD
- Grief and loss
- Anger issues or emotional regulation problems
- Self-harm or suicidal thoughts
- Feeling overwhelmed or “stuck”
Identity & Self-Esteem
- Low self-esteem or self-worth
- Identity issues (e.g., racial, cultural, gender, sexual orientation)
- Body image issues
- Difficulty asserting boundaries or saying no
Stress & Life Transitions
- Work stress, burnout, or career uncertainty
- Life (e.g., divorce, relocation, new parenthood)
- Academic pressure or school-related difficulties
- Aging, chronic illness, or disability
Behavioral Concerns
- ADHD or executive functioning challenges
- Addiction or substance use
- Eating disorders
- Compulsive behaviors (e.g., internet, gambling, shopping)
Growth & Exploration
- Personal development
- Spiritual exploration
- Understanding the impact of childhood and past experiences
- Learning new coping or communication skills
Couples’ Reasons to Go to Therapy
Communication & Conflict
- Frequent arguments or communication breakdown
- Stonewalling, criticism, or emotional withdrawal
- Mismatched conflict styles
Trust & Betrayal
- Infidelity, emotional affairs, or secrecy
- Rebuilding trust after betrayal
Sex & Intimacy
- Mismatched sexual desire or dysfunction
- Disconnection or loss of physical affection
- Navigating kink, polyamory, or other relationship dynamics
Life Transitions
- Preparing for marriage or managing early marital issues
- Infertility or decision-making about having children
- Transitioning to parenthood
- Step parent counseling and support
- Coping with aging, illness, or caregiving responsibilities
Values & Goals
- Financial disagreements
- Differences in values or life goals
- Deciding whether to stay together or separate
Families Going to Therapy Together
Parent-Child Relationships
- Behavioral issues in children or teens
- Communication struggles between parents and kids
- Navigating discipline, boundaries, or screen time
- Co-parenting after separation or divorce
Family Stressors
- Coping with a loved one’s illness, addiction, or mental health issues
- Loss of a family member
- Adjustment to blended families or step-parenting
Systemic Challenges
- Intergenerational trauma
- Cultural or religious conflict within the family
- Impact of racism, immigration stress, or minority stress
Building Skills & Strength
- Improving family communication and cohesion
- Building empathy and reducing blame
- Learning how to support a struggling family member
- Creating healthier family rules, routines, or rituals
Determining: Should I Go To Therapy?
Deciding whether to go to therapy can feel overwhelming, but a simple way to start is by asking yourself a few key questions about how you’re feeling, functioning, and connecting with others.
Should I Go to Therapy?
Here’s a self-check to help you decide, “Should I go to therapy?”.
- Are you feeling emotionally overwhelmed or stuck?
- You feel sad, anxious, irritable, or numb most days
- Your emotions feel out of control, or you find yourself shutting down
- You’re feeling hopeless or questioning the point of things
- Are your daily responsibilities harder than usual?
- Trouble focusing, sleeping, or completing work/school tasks
- You feel burned out or exhausted all the time
- You’re withdrawing from people or avoiding responsibilities
- Are your relationships struggling?
- Constant conflict with family, friends, or your partner
- Feeling lonely, even around people
- Struggles with boundaries, trust, or communication
- Have you experienced something difficult or traumatic?
- A recent loss, breakup, accident, assault, or illness
- Childhood trauma or abuse that still affects you
- A significant life change that’s hard to adjust to
- Are you using coping strategies that don’t feel healthy?
- Numbing out with food, alcohol, screens, or substances
- Avoiding emotions or isolating yourself
- Angry outbursts or harmful thoughts/behaviors
- Are you looking to gain a deeper understanding of yourself or grow personally?
- Wanting to develop confidence or self-esteem
- Exploring identity (e.g., gender, sexuality, culture, religion)
- Hoping to break old patterns or improve decision-making
Other Reasons to Go to Therapy
- You’re generally okay, but not feeling like yourself
- You’ve tried self-help, but it’s not enough
- You want things to change, but don’t know how
- You feel like a burden to others
- You’ve been told by someone who cares about you that it might help
- You keep thinking, “Should I go to therapy?” and feel like that’s a sign
Common Misconceptions (That Might Be Holding You Back)
| Myth | Truth |
| “I’m not sick enough.” | You don’t have to be in crisis to go. Many people go for support, clarity, and growth. |
| “Therapy means I’m weak.” | Asking for help is actually a sign of strength and self-awareness. |
| “Therapists just listen—I can talk to my friends.” | A trained therapist helps you dig deeper, notice patterns, and learn real tools for change. |
| “It’s too expensive or time-consuming.” | There are affordable options, and even a few sessions can be helpful. Think of it as investing in your well-being. |
How Often Should You Go To Therapy?
Answering “How often should you go to therapy?” depends on your individual needs, goals, and situation. Here’s a general guide to help you understand what might work best for you:
How Often Should You Go to Therapy? The Possibilities:
- Weekly Sessions (Most Common)
- Typical for many people starting out.
- Helps build a strong therapeutic relationship.
- Provides regular support for ongoing issues like anxiety, depression, trauma, or relationship struggles.
- Allows steady progress with tools and coping skills.
- Biweekly or Every Other Week
- Good if your challenges are less acute or you’re managing symptoms well.
- Helps maintain gains once you’re feeling more stable.
- Works if your schedule or budget doesn’t allow weekly visits.
- Monthly Check-Ins
- For ongoing maintenance after significant progress.
- Helpful when treatment focuses on long-term growth, rather than crisis management.
- Useful for specific challenges, such as coping with chronic illness or significant life transitions.
- Intensive or More Frequent Sessions
- Sometimes two or more times per week in severe cases (e.g., trauma, crisis, addiction).
- For specific point-in-time reasons like fear of flying or fear of public speaking anxiety treatment
- Usually short-term and closely monitored.
- As Needed / Drop-in
- Some people use sessions sporadically during stressful life events.
- Helpful if you’ve already done long-term treatment but want support during transitions.
You and your therapist will work together to answer the question, “How often should you go to therapy?” based on your goals and preferences.
Factors Influencing Frequency
- Severity of symptoms: More intense struggles often need more frequent sessions.
- Goals: Working through trauma or deep issues may require weekly sessions; skill-building or maintenance might not.
- Budget and insurance: Practical considerations often shape frequency.
- Therapist recommendation: Your therapist can help tailor the frequency based on your progress.
- Your schedule and availability: Consistency is key, but sessions need to fit your life.
How to Convince Someone To Go To Therapy
Convincing someone to go to therapy can be delicate because it involves their feelings, fears, and personal readiness. Here’s a thoughtful approach to encouraging someone gently and effectively:
How to Convince Someone to Go to Therapy: A Guide
- Choose the Right Moment
- Find a calm, private time to talk.
- Avoid bringing it up during arguments or stressful moments.
- Approach with empathy and patience.
- Express Concern Without Judgment
- Use “I” statements to share your feelings:
“I’ve noticed you’ve been really struggling lately, and I care about you.”
“I want to make sure you get support because you don’t have to go through this alone.” - Avoid blaming, criticizing, or making them feel weak.
- Normalize the experience of a therapy appointment.
- Explain that behavioral health treatment is a common, helpful resource for many people, not just for “serious” problems.
- Share examples if comfortable: friends, family, or even yourself who benefited.
- Mention that therapy can help with stress, relationships, or personal growth.
- Answer, “Why do people go to therapy?” in a supportive, positive manner
- Address Their Concerns
- Ask what worries them. Common concerns include stigma, cost, time, or fear of being judged.
- Provide information or solutions, if possible, such as affordable options, online approaches, or assurances of confidentiality.
- Reassure them it’s a safe space and therapists are there to help, not judge.
- Offer Support
- Suggest helping them find a clinician or making the first appointment.
- Offer to go with them to their therapy appointment if it feels supportive.
- Let them know you’ll be there regardless of their decision.
- Be Patient and Respect Boundaries
- Remember, they must want it for themselves for it to be effective.
- If they say no, respect that — keep the door open for future conversations.
- Continue showing care and support without putting pressure on them.
Knowing how to convince someone to go to therapy can be valuable and provide you with the motivation to help a friend or family member in need.
Example Script
“Hey, I just wanted to say I’ve noticed you seem overwhelmed lately, and I’m worried about you. I think talking to a therapist could be a constructive way to get some support and tools to feel better. It’s something a lot of people do, and it doesn’t mean you’re weak or broken. If you’d like, I can help you find someone or even accompany you to the first session. I care about you, and I’m here no matter what.” This is the kind of script you can modify as you learn how to convince someone to go to therapy.
Summary and Conclusion
So, why do people go to therapy? A therapy appointment can be a flexible and accessible tool that can meet a wide range of needs, from crisis intervention to ongoing personal development. Deciding to begin going to therapy, determining the appropriate frequency of sessions, and encouraging others to seek help are deeply personal decisions that should be approached with compassion and respect.
Remember, the reasons to go to therapy do not have to do with weakness but rather are part of proactive choices toward greater resilience, deeper meaning, and healthier relationships. By fostering openness about mental health and support options, we can reduce stigma and create environments where everyone feels empowered to seek the care they deserve.
To set up a therapy appointment, learn more about how to convince someone to go to therapy, or discover my specific services, please contact me or schedule a consultation anytime.
